Yesterday was so beautiful! We went to eat at a restaurant called La Rustica in a neighborhood next to where I live, Barranco. Barranco is a beautiful bohemian town where there are less gringos wondering around with guide books and daypacks.. All the buildings are colorful and adorned with flower pots or lamp posts and the streets are laid with brick. Our lunch was very big but very delicious, and REAL peruvian cuisine (more so than the first day when we arrived). After lunch we walked to a pacific coast look-out area where there was one man selling beautiful jewelery and hand-crafts and another man sitting on a wooden box and playing it like a drum. It was a really good moment for me, kind of a quiet moment to regain a peace of mind and soak in where in the world I am. Looking out into the ocean and with the sun shining to warm the winter air in Lima, I was really happy.. I'm hoping to spend some more time at the coast to write and study and relax and escape the noisy city. I'm also hoping to become well acquainted with the night-life in Barranco.. it's where all the 20-something-year-olds go at night... maybe tomorrow night!?

Today was long, as usual with orientation activities... First we had a lecture about the education system here in Peru and at PUCP. It's very different in the sense that students are less competitive among each other here and more accustomed to working together.. for example groups with form where one person will read one section and 2 others will read different sections and everyone will share their notes and always study together. I like this, but I'm nervous because our director was explaining how we need to make sure we enter into groups of peruvian students to study with.. this will be difficult with a language barrier being that I won't exactly be desirable to work with... But I plan on giving it my all and trying to blend it as well as possible. Also, PUCP is a DIFFICULT university, we've been warned. Our director told us, if you think you came to study abroad for fun, think again. This kind of scared me because if I think Temple's Honor Courses kick my ass, what will it be like in Spanish?! My goals are to Pass (opposed to failing) and to become fluent conversationally where I can speak without inhibition. After looking through options for courses, I also don't think I'll be able to take business courses. There are only a few select courses that could possibly transfer to temple's business equivalency rather than as electives and these courses (here) are only offered with class on SATURDAYS!!!!! also, we've been warned at the difficulty level of professors here and how they do not slow down for foreign students.. so I'm not sure if I want to kill myself. i've come to conclude that this is a semester for myself... to learn what interests me truly.. So tonight I'll look through and decide on some more interesting courses.

Later we went to watch a movie as a group called "Chungui," it's a town in Peru.. it was about the violence among the townspeople, the terrorists and the government here in Peru.. While there was a lot that I didn't understand, I got the jist of it and learned more about the social state of Peru from talking to my family when I got home. In the 80s there was a lot of violence throughout peru and discrimination based on skin color and social status.. the documentary showed images and testimonies of family members who witness the violence in which terrorists would murder others in horrible ways.. cutting off their hands and telling them to eat them while they were still alive, and their ears, noses, eyes and privates. It was horrible to see a woman telling the journalist filming the testimony of how she watched her sons' suffering and murder.. Then tonight my host mom and sister and I were talking about the racism and discrimination problems that still exist in Peru today, especially in Lima.. My mom was telling me how people from different regions discriminate of course on skin color and that, for example, in some bars and cafes here in Lima, the owners wont let darker more indigenous appearing people to enter... even if the owner his/her self has the same appearance. She also told me how people like me, a gringa from north america, is given special treatment in many instances.. it's strange to think I walk around through a new city where I am trying to fit in but I will never fit in because some people will always look at me as a symbol of money or opportunity simply because of my skin color.

I was talking with some other people who are here today too, that we feel like we are cheating Peruvians out of their money.. Everythingggg is cheap here, and that's great. but they don't tip here, meals costs like $3-$5 for us and traveling on the combi costs like $.50 one way.... This weekend I may go on a day trip to a place just outside of lima where you can camp/hike through waterfalls... I can go there for like $1.00 on a combi.. crazy! At the same time, I feel like I always need to keep my guard up.

Another thing that's strange to get used to about having a housemaid is how to interact with them. Sometimes it seems like they are more a part of the family and sometimes it seems like they're in the house simply to work. I really like Saira, our "ama," but she seems surprised when I start conversation with her or when I ask her questions to get to know her.. as though I'm crossing a line. But I don't know where else she gets friendly interaction in her life and she's a good way to learn more about the culture... it's just strange to think I just show up in this house and our ama, who has been here longer than me, seems to have so much respect for -me-.. I feel so undeserving of how well I seem to be treated here sometimes, it's weird.. Like how every morning she makes coffee and breakfast for me and how every night she asks me what I want to eat and prepares it.... That's the norm here. how do i get used to that without feeling strange?

I am started to get reallyyyyyyy frustrated with having group meetings/times that I have to do things with IFSA.. it's like I feel like a tourist... and for some reason I can't focus very long in these activities.. I want to feel more independent.. which I suppose will happen next week when my "real world" in peru begins.. I just get frusterated trying to speak spanish and then english and trying to understand what our directors are explaining.. I understand the most when I talk with my family at home, I think home and in class is where I'll soak up the most language skills.

This has been a long blog entry!

:)